You know you’re in Alabama when…

1.You take the kids out to dinner and get a few orders of chicken fingers and fries. The kids also order chicken fingers and fries.

2.You know better than to hop straight into your car on a summer day. Doing so will lead to certain death,  so you stand outside and sweat for a few minutes and wait for your seat to cool to outside temperature.

3.The legal drinking age is 21, but the real drinking age is 14

4.You can no longer drive five miles without seeing an Alexander Shunnarah billboard.

5.The roads are filled with lifted trucks with Mossy Oak decals on the back windows.

6. The sweet tea is the consistency of maple syrup

7. You wear your winter coat for fashion only

8.You see folks with tattoos of state colleges that they never attended.

9. Houndstooth is more than just a pattern its a way of life.

10. The yearly family vacation is always to the Gulf.

11. Marriage and kids are expected by age 25.

12. Your air conditioner is running ten months out of the year.

13. The only sport worth watching is college football. If you’re one of the seven people in the state who is not a football fan, you know that the best time to go grocery shopping is during the game.


Author: Richard Carter

Former New Yorker turned Alabamian

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